Fit or Fat ?

I have been dealing with weight issues ever since I can remember. When I was about 10 my parents brought me to a hospital teen support group for heavy pre-teens, called "Shape Down." I dreaded going every week to sit with all the shlubby kids, often bigger than me, or so I thought. They would have weigh-ins and let you know if you were on the right track or you were slacking off. The directors were these peppy upbeat individuals who iritated me to my very core. "Why do you care so much about how I look?", I would cry to my parents in the back seat of their Buick. My mother would always give me the same answer, she'd look at me lovingly and say "Fayga, your beautiful and we love you just the way you are, we just want you to be healthier." I only understood and appreciated her words as I got older.
It was in my early twenties that it truly hit me. We would periodically go to Baltimore to visit my father's mother. She loved to take us shopping. So my sister whose 4 years older than me and I wanted to go to this cute boutique shop. Everything I tried on and liked either looked horrible or didnt even fit. My sister would come out of the dressing room looking adorable of course"modeling" for my family. While I was still in the dressing room wiggling out of the last size in a top I liked, I heard my Grandma's whisper." That Fayga, I'm worried about her, she's gotten so big." As we purchased the clothes for my sister I fought back tears. As soon as we dropped off my grandmother and got back to where we were staying I let it all out. Twenty something years of pent up frustration with the hurtful remarks from classmates and boys, to my Grandmother's honest but stingful words. My mother listening to me and wiping away my tears said very calmly, " So if your that upset, do something about it ." Now I'm sure she said this to me a million times growing up but it was as if I heard them for the first time. And you know what? I did do something. I hired a nutritionist and trainer and lost 40 lbs! This was about 5 years ago. I eventually stopped seeing them because I could no longer afford it and it was life consuming. But I am forever grateful of that time in my life.
Now, although I've put back on some of the weight. I have a totally different veiw on dieting. Its shouldn't be a fad or because you want to fit into a dress for an event. It's for your health. Its a way of life. Eating right and excersing regularly has more than a weighloss benefit. Its keeps you healthy physically and mentally! Even if I slack off I know I can wake up the next morning and start again. Afterall tommorow is another day.